Beyond Prescriptions: A Holistic Approach to Women’s Sexual Health

As a doctor, I often meet women who come to me seeking help with hormones. Whether it’s estrogen, progesterone, testosterone, or even “scream cream” for enhancing sexual pleasure. And while I do prescribe these treatments when appropriate, I always emphasize that sexual health is about more than just hormones or medications.

True intimacy, satisfaction, and connection in our relationships involve the mind, the body, and the partnership itself. That’s why I take a holistic approach when working with women on their sexual health.

The Role of Therapy and Communication

One of the most impactful steps women (and couples) can take is to work with a skilled marriage or relationship counselor. I often recommend Erika Botha, a compassionate and insightful counselor who helps couples build communication, deepen intimacy, and work through barriers that may be affecting their sexual relationship.

Dr. Esther Perel is a world-renowned psychotherapist who has transformed the conversation around desire, intimacy, and relationships. She explores the tension between the need for security and the desire for adventure in long-term partnerships, showing how this tension can impact sexual desire.

Perel emphasizes that eroticism and desire are cultivated, not automatic. She encourages couples to be curious, playful, and creative with one another, finding ways to maintain passion without compromising emotional safety. Her work highlights the importance of communication, not just about problems, but also about fantasies, needs, and boundaries.

A key takeaway from Perel’s work is that sexual satisfaction is deeply intertwined with emotional connection. Addressing conflicts, fostering trust, and nurturing the sense of being desired are all crucial components of a thriving sexual relationship.

Better Sex Through Mindfulness

Another invaluable resource I recommend is Better Sex Through Mindfulness by Dr. Lori Brotto. This book offers a practical, research-based approach to enhancing sexual well-being through awareness and presence.

Dr. Brotto explains that many women experience sexual difficulties not because of lack of desire but due to distraction, stress, or disconnection from their bodies. Mindfulness, a practice of nonjudgmental awareness of the present moment, can dramatically improve sexual experience by helping women tune into their own sensations, emotions, and responses.

Through guided exercises and meditations, Brotto teaches techniques to reduce anxiety, increase arousal, and improve intimacy. For example, focusing attention on bodily sensations during sexual activity, rather than on worries or performance, allows women to experience more pleasure and satisfaction.

The book also explores how mindfulness can help couples communicate more effectively about sex, reduce shame, and cultivate a deeper connection. It’s a tool that empowers women to reclaim their sexual agency and prioritize their own pleasure.

Tips to Enhance Intimacy and Pleasure

Here are some simple strategies you can start using today:

If you have ANY discomfort, see your health care provider for a physical exam and vaginal estrogen.

From Dr. Lori Brotto:

• Mindful Touch Exercise: Set aside 10–15 minutes to explore your own body with curiosity and nonjudgment. Notice sensations, temperature, and textures without rushing or aiming for orgasm.

• Focus on the Senses: During sexual activity, pay attention to smells, sounds, sights, and tactile sensations. This keeps you grounded in the moment and enhances pleasure.

• Breathing Together: Slow, deep breathing with your partner can increase arousal and connection. Synchronizing breaths creates a subtle sense of intimacy.

  
  

From Dr. Esther Perel:

• Create Curiosity: Ask your partner questions about their fantasies, desires, or what excites them. Sharing in a playful, judgment-free way can reignite intimacy.

• Schedule Playful Time: Life can be busy, but setting aside “erotic time” for connection like flirting, massages, or date nights helps maintain desire.

• Balance Security and Novelty: Experiment with small surprises, new activities, or role-play. This keeps desire alive while maintaining the safety and trust of your relationship.

  
  

From Dr. Ian Kerner:

• Prioritize Female Pleasure: Take time to focus on what feels good for you. Communicate with your partner about techniques and preferences.

A Whole-Person Perspective

Hormones and medical treatments can absolutely play an important role in women’s sexual health, but they are only one piece of the puzzle. By addressing not only the physical but also the emotional, psychological, and relational aspects of sexuality, women can achieve a fuller, more satisfying experience of intimacy.

As I tell my patients: healing and thriving in this area isn’t just about a prescription, it’s about connection, communication, curiosity, and cultivating pleasure in all its forms.

If you would like to book with our team in person, download our referral form here.